Sarah and Jerome in conversation

Something to make you be glad to be single - I was party to the following conversation between my friend Sarah and her boyfriend Jerome yesterday;




Sarah (speaking to me): 'I gave him a book for Christmas ('1984') because he N-E-V-E-R reads anything.'

Sarah to Jerome:

'You NEVER READ ANYTHING!'

Sarah to me:

'Its a fucking disgrace, I'm telling you...'



Jerome (to me): 'I read! I read Spiderman!'



Sarah ( to me, but I sense also directed at Jerome): 'A comic book.'

Sarah looks witheringly at Jerome

'Its a fucking comic book!!'



Jerome: 'No! Its not! Its good!'



Sarah (spooning fried egg into her mouth with a sense of superiority, if that is indeed possible): 'He dropped my fucking bookmark in the toilet! With. His. Shit! With his fucking shit!'



Jerome: 'What? I cleaned it!'



Sarah (to me): 'He bleached it. He dropped my bookmark on his shit, and then he gave it back to me'.



Jerome: 'I cleaned it!'



Sarah: 'He shit on my bookmark. Then he cleaned it and gave it back to me'.



Me: 'And they say romance is dead, eh?'

Trying to change subject..

'And what did you think of '1984' Jerome, did you enjoy it?'



Sarah: 'Its still sat in the fucking bathroom, covered in shit...'