Something to make you be glad to be single - I was party to the following conversation between my friend Sarah and her boyfriend Jerome yesterday;
Sarah (speaking to me): 'I gave him a book for Christmas ('1984') because he N-E-V-E-R reads anything.'
Sarah to Jerome:
'You NEVER READ ANYTHING!'
Sarah to me:
'Its a fucking disgrace, I'm telling you...'
Jerome (to me): 'I read! I read Spiderman!'
Sarah ( to me, but I sense also directed at Jerome): 'A comic book.'
Sarah looks witheringly at Jerome
'Its a fucking comic book!!'
Jerome: 'No! Its not! Its good!'
Sarah (spooning fried egg into her mouth with a sense of superiority, if that is indeed possible): 'He dropped my fucking bookmark in the toilet! With. His. Shit! With his fucking shit!'
Jerome: 'What? I cleaned it!'
Sarah (to me): 'He bleached it. He dropped my bookmark on his shit, and then he gave it back to me'.
Jerome: 'I cleaned it!'
Sarah: 'He shit on my bookmark. Then he cleaned it and gave it back to me'.
Me: 'And they say romance is dead, eh?'
Trying to change subject..
'And what did you think of '1984' Jerome, did you enjoy it?'
Sarah: 'Its still sat in the fucking bathroom, covered in shit...'
